Thursday, October 23, 2008


WWPFTD?: Paul F. Tompkins Gives You Much Needed Life Advice

Gentle Readers:
I’m sure you see me on the TV screen and think, “I wish I could talk to that guy. I want to ask him questions and have him tell me how to live my life.” Well, somebody here forced me to make your beautiful dream come true! Send your questions here to me and I’ll give you the best advice I feel like giving!

Just part of my contract,

Dear Paul F. Tompkins,

My son, who is nine, has never been into sports or guns or typical “boy stuff.” I know it makes my husband a little uncomfortable, but he tries to be as supportive as he can. The other day, my son came to me and said that for Halloween this year, he’s decided to dress as a lady! I’m predicting my husband will freak out, so I’m asking, WWPFTD?

Kelly T.

Dear Kells:
I like that your son said “a lady” instead of “some broad”. He sounds like a class act, like Michael Feinstein. I can only assume your husband is afraid that your son might be gay. I only say this because your son is obviously gay. So then I’d remind your husband that it’s 2008 and being gay is not a strike against his son, who is his own flesh and blood. Also, if a nine year old boy is dressing like a lady for Hallowe’en, he sounds like a badass. He clearly doesn’t care if other kids might give him a hard time; he’s got his priorities straight. Priority #1: be outrageous. Tell your husband to relax. This kid’s gonna be fine.

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